You Are What You Read

There was something comforting, and almost inspiring, about being surrounded by all of my stuff this weekend. I had to sort through it, pitch some of it, and organize and pack the rest. I didn't even realize I missed myself so much. I am grateful to be on the couch, in my sweatpants, watching the Oscars. Loading and unloading the truck by myself proved to be a bit more than my body could take. It's days like these where I think having a husband or a dad could come in handy. It was nice to know I could still get it done on my own. Sometimes I wish I didn't feel I had so much to prove to myself. I think it's a matter of not wanting to inconvenience anyone, really. I have a ton of people in my life who would totally jump in and help without thinking twice. Nobody likes to move, however, and I didn't want anyone to feel obligated to say yes. Random thought: You know, I often think of things to write, short updates, or long anecdotes, throughout each day. More often than not, however, I just don't take the time to sit down and type it out. Sometimes it's a matter of not being in a position to be able to write. So, the thoughts are left to swim around in my head and drive me halfway to crazy. And we're back: I cannot wait until I move into a space where I can actually unpack all of my books. The last time I was able to do that was 10 years ago. I didn't really own many books then. Half of the bins I packed today contain books. My life is half books. Seems like an appropriate percentage.

Saturday Morning Thought

"You have to find just as much satisfaction in saving money as you do in spending it."  -Suze Orman

 

Just did a quick read through of my friends who I am following here on blogger.  It's amazing, really.  I am following a man who is in seminary to become a priest, a soldier in Afghanistan, a woman in the Peace Corps in Africa, a writer (and a very good one at that), a girl doing missionary work in Haiti, a friend who is raising triplets, another friend who adopted a child from Ethiopia, and two high school girls who recently were recognized in a top fashion magazine as "best fashion blog".  Kinda makes you start to wonder, what the heck am I doing here, sitting on my hands, while everyone else seems to be doing some extraordinary things?

I have the will and drive to serve.  I always thought it would be in some distant place, perhaps a third world country.  Why is it I feel I am being called to serve in my own backyard?  They say, 'Don't stay until God tells you to go, go until God tells you to stay'.  Well, this might be the place.  I just wish I knew what He wanted me to do.  I have all this energy and passion to just freely give.  Maybe that's what you do, you just start giving with what you have, right now.

Okay.  It really is that simple, isn't it? 

Run, Run, Run, Stop. Run, Run.....

It seems my life these days is either completely hectic, or completely at a stand still. My day starts tomorrow at 6am, like usual, and then I don't stop moving until I get home around 10 or 11 on Sunday night. Monday, on the other hand, will be a 10 hour day, as usual, with the two hour break in there (when I usually totally crash), and time will craaaaaawl. I am meeting an old friend for lunch tomorrow. She's a camp friend, so I'm excited, of course. It always strikes my heart in the best way possible to see camp friends. After work, I have to drive to Saginaw and attempt to pack up my belongings that remain in my old apartment in one night. I will rent a van/truck on Saturday, load it up, and pick up my mom on the way to Cass City to drop everything off. My aunt has been kind enough to lend me part of her garage. I just have to drive to Cass City to utilize it. Hey, it will save money on a storage shed somewhere. Who knows how long this stuff will need to be stored, right? It might be three months. It might be three years. I will drive back and spend what's left of the evening with my mother. On Sunday, after I take back the moving van, I hope to make a surprise appearance at a baby shower. It would be nice to see all the lovely ladies who will most likely be in attendance. When I get back to Detroit, there is an awesome event at 1515 Broadway downtown. I want to make it to this event. It is a one night only screening of what looks to be a great movie. A PBS-endorsed film, “A Good Man“ follows acclaimed director/choreographer Bill T. Jones (Last Supper at Uncle Tom’s Cabin, Still/Here, FELA!) as he and his company create their most ambitious work, an original dance-theater piece in honor of Abraham Lincoln’s Bicentennial. Many people from the project are going to be there for a talk back, and the event is to help raise money to keep 1515 open. Events like this are the reason I moved here in the first place. I need to actually start attending these things downtown. I love downtown! Anyway....a long weekend ahead... 

...followed by a very looooong week.....not because there's so much going on, but because time just craaaaawls during the daytime throughout the week. What a long, boring week (and I only worked two days!) Thank goodness for nights like this one, where I get a chance to teach again, helping a senior workshop through some monologues and songs for auditions. I hope I always have the chance to teach, in whatever capacity. It might be the only thing driving me right now. I have so much to write....random posts I never actually posted, and long drawn out thoughts on all the craziness (or lack of craziness) that is my life right now. I think it's safe to say I have way too much time to think during each day. It will all have to wait....5:30am comes so fast. Good night!

All The Small Things

"Go with the people. Live with them. Learn from them. Love them. Start with what they know. Build with what they have. But with the best leaders, when the job is done, the task accomplished, the people will all say, "We have done this ourselves." -Lao Tsu, China, 700 BC I was wondering where to begin in this giant city. It's really as simple as Lao Tsu describes it. Start small, with a small population, a small need, and continue working and loving people, and change will manifest itself. If we all do this, big things can, and will, happen.

In 7 Days He Created The World: In 3 Days He Re-Created Mine

Everything crumbles. He brings me to my knees. I look to him from the floor, suddenly conscious of where our relationship stands. I stand, wipe off my knees, and get to work. I stumble, look to Him, then continue working. He blesses me. He blesses me again. And again. Suddenly, I'm smiling. No, I'm laughing. I look at Him, not quite understanding. I accept the good. Because I accepted the crumbling. We begin to rebuild....